White devil.

I guess my doctor had a wonderful sense of humor.  He prescribed these tiny little white pills, that I dutifully took.  The first day I took 6.  At once.  I followed the directions.

The second day I took two in the morning, one in the afternoon, and two that night.

Then, I went crazy.  Like, batshit totally effing crazy.

I threw things, and yelled and screamed.  And while I can recall the fervor with which I tried to single-handedly destroy my house (and all those who lived in it) I can't recall WHY exactly, I was so, um, miffed.

So Bryan took out the insert for my little white pills, and read the warning.  Which was:

Watch the fuck out, because this can make some bitches crazy. 

There were the words -- no lie -- PSYCHOTIC EPISODE in the warning.

So Bryan called the hospital, and the doctor said, "Yeah, that's happened before.  If she's doing okay by not taking them, then she can just stop."

Well, at least I know where to get some PCP the next time my family is in town and I want to make an impression.

The good news is that the doctor visits were less than $300, so I guess they're not trying to turn a profit on making people lose their minds.  I was worried it was going to be, like, a bajillion dollars.  In which case I would've had to go down there, and slam my hand on the counter, and yell, "THIS IS TOO MUCH!"  Or I could take another dose of pills and throw coffee mugs at the orderlies.

 I leave you with this photo, taken of Charlie when she was caught getting under the sink.  No one yelled at her or anything, we just said her name, and she did this:

Which I find funny, even when I'm not taking my Satan pills. 

Comments

[Dotty]

WTF!! Now that is scary. This is why I am so suspicious of medications.

[Teri]

Whoa dude. So glad the exorcist action was short-lived. That photo is priceless: reminds me of Tessa, who freaks out at the least provocation these days...

[krystyn]

Holy bejeezus!

I am so using this as an excuse next time I flip out for real.

"Um, sorry, it was those damn little white pills. I should really stop taking them!"

[krystyn]

p.s. That picture is a SCREAM.

[Jennifer]

Were they steroids? My dad is taking steroids for a cough, and they have made him aggressive and horribly emotional. He said they make one of my aunts go psycho...

[sarahgrace]

I so know that face...

[Sarah]

I suppose now you're going to tell us that Bryan was too busy ducking flying crockery to take any video of Batshit Crazy Lady for YouTube? Honestly, where are his priorities?

[C.Flicken]

Hey, birth control pills made me go batshit crazy! I was a trainwreck for about a month, there. Except my satan pills were green!

I stopped taking them, too. It was too scary.

I love Charlie's reaction, that is so classic "Oh crap, they caught me, better cry hysterically!!!"

[C.Flicken]

And too? I love her little hand over her mouth. She looks like my 60+ year-old Aunt Louise trying not to pee herself laughing.

[C.Flicken]

Um. Your daughter is cute, I didn't mean she looks like she's an incontinent elderly lady.

[Sarah]

I got to "60+ year-old Aunt Louise" and just assumed that the rest of the sentence was going to be "when she was caught getting under the sink".

[Jules]

Love that photo!